Tuesday 4 June 2013

Life with the Amanda Ann Family part Four

This morning I woke up next to my wife, as it should be, but I know it didn't start out that way...


Why is this damned house so full of people?

 Mary and Lord Posh are sleeping on our living room floor, spent from a night of violent love-making


Leaving Mrs Slagg to take over Mary's duties, (with some difficulty)





  Consequently, morning tea is late:


Just when I needed it most....

There is someone else in this house too.  Sleeping upstairs.  But I don't want to think about them ...

I go to the (new) conservatory with my cold tea and ponder about the night before.

 Was that really me with that beautiful creature last night?  Helplessly lost in ecstacy?  Surely I dreamt such a thing





 Yet, if it was, how can I still smell her skin?  And taste her lips?

And whatever will I say to her now?



And surely no-one can be that beautiful, that stunning, that exciting?  No.  It must have been a dream. Krista.  I tremble at her name. 

Meanwhile, Marjorie, about to go through the same gates herself, was disturbed by the intense noise from upstairs.  The sheer animal pleasure rankles her.  

Especially once she recognises that it's her boring  old husband!


Hamish stupidly overplayed his hand.
"Och, Hen!  I didn't know your old man had it in him!"




Earning him a swift kick in the bollocks from Marjory!




"Jings!", he cried.

Marjorie threw him out on his ear.  She would explain 

what happened when Lavinia returned from Christian camp.  (An edited version)



Krista calls after me as I come down the stairs.  My insides turn to jelly.  

"Paul", her voice makes me light-headed, "Why do you not look at me?"

"I don't know what you're talking about", I say stiffly

"Last night was the same for you, as it was for me, Paul.  I know it was. We've fallen in love, haven't we"



"Don't forget your bag," I tell her stiffly, "And thank you so much for coming.  Now I must get back to my wife!"


She stifles a sob, and runs through the door.  Pain and agony wet in her blue eyes.  My own eyes fill up - probably damn hayfever!





There are to be no more visitors, or overnight guests.  Today and every day, I just want to be left alone.  I do not want glimpses into a life I can't have.  I do not want to see into a future that cannot be mine.
 
"Oh Krista!"  Someone cries, before I realise it was me.


Don't miss episode five of this family in turmoil.

Tune in same time, same channel!!!



3 comments:

  1. Oh Paul, you poor lost creature. You'll get over her. Or will you....?

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  2. I'm gripped, any chance of this being picked up by Disney and made into a live action 3D surround sound type thing?, I can even see this being made into an attraction at Disneyland. I'd certainly pay money to have a go on Mrs Slagg

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  3. I was thinking maybe The Pet Shop Boys will be interested. Sadlers Wells would be a good venue.

    xx

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