Such as Lavinia's increasing coldness to her much older fiancee....
.... and no more nightly visits to her bedchamber.
So, late the next evening, I set my own little trap, and awaited in anticipation.
And my patience rewards me, as they both climb the stairs to Lavinia's room.
"Papa!", Lavinia exclaimed, horrified.
"Awright, mate?", Melvin greeted me cockily
"Lavinia, off to bed.", I said calmly
"Papa! You don't understand!", she shrieked.
"Oh I think I do. Come and join me in the conservatory, Melvin.", I said quite amiably.
I smiled warmly at the boy, but my eyes stayed cold.
"Got a fag, mate?", Melvin ventured
"No.", I said, "Now, Melvin, what's it going to be then, eh? A rifle up the jacksey, or a bashing from Mrs Slagg? Which one will make you run faster?"
"Oi! Mr AA! I'm a good boy, I am!"
"Fuck off," I said calmly. And he did just that.
Lavinia did not take this very well.
And brutally broke off her engagement with our closest friend.
So that night, Lord Posh and I raided the Gin and got hammered (Marjorie already passing out).
And Lord Posh ended up in bed with Mary....
And I, with Mara
(weekend visit)
Marjorie, upon coming to, simply smirked.
Better the devil you know, and all that.
But where was Lavinia......?!
Gasp! Surely she hasn't eloped with that Melvin?!
Will Lavinia's parents ever find her? Will Marjorie ever be sober? What has that fiend Melvin, done with little Lavinia?!
Don't miss the next gripping installment. Tune in, same time, same channel....
For blogs and interviews with these static stars, click the link below:
lifewiththeamandaannfamily.weebly.com
No comments:
Post a Comment